Tag Archives: advise

I wasn’t ready.


It’s no one’s fault, but mine alone,

The trials of life, soon disappeared,

Alone at night, put fear aside,

The bitter facts, that all men lie,

A bold denial, my tears flow miles.

I ran so hard, this race called life,

I spread my wings, grew up too quick,

Surrounded by friends, from college to graduation,

I grabbed each opportunity firmly, both hands gripped tightly.

It happened at three, that weekend it rained,

We gathered to party, after weeks of working,

Invited to Camden, a jazz bar and restaurant,

We totaled eight, four men with their lies.

Drinks flowed from the bar, mastercard on tap,

Men flirted with danger, women lingered in laughter,

Dinner deliciously digested, jazz smoothed our souls,

Sexy atmosphere around us, pretty drunk I sounded.

My boss stuck to my side, his hands wearing his vows,

He planted his hands, upon my knees,

I wasn’t ready and froze, his lips planted a kiss,

My mind lost in confusion, my body seeking translation,

This kiss opened a chapter, his lips broken my walls,

Sadness crept inside me, anger turned on and bite me,

I pulled away from him, the slap was well deserved,

I grew up way to quick, this story, his kiss was not my click.

By Julius Fa

Trapped behind this door.


Where is the days? Where is the nights?
Behind these walls, I sense all is lost,
Time forgot me, sanity denies me.
This pandemic haunts me, fear holds me.

I have no friends, I lost my job,
I hate to Zoom, I’ll rather die,
My boss was wrong, to end my furlough,
The greed of men, my mental self cries.

I weigh too much, I will not eat,
This room is ugly, inside am lonely,
My stomach aches, for food no doubt,
Leave me alone dad, and mum get out, This room is lovely, it’s me whose ugly.

This isn’t me, it isn’t fair,
I curse this Covid, for stealing my mind,
I had few friends, a job I loved,
Freedom to live, my life was good,
But now we’re caged, this lockdown my rage.

I walk this garden, I see this door,
It’s locked always, no key is found,
It’s covered with weed, am frozen with fear,
My mouth is sealed, I can’t call out,
The number beside, the date I died.

By Julius Fa
©2021

If Night Could Talk.


It was a winter, just like this.

The days are long and the nights grew short.

If time could talk, it would have said,

what humans would do when hid in the dark,

Can you see through the dark of sin,

The stars that watch and turned away,

It seems at times that if we talked,

The world would listen and stars will fly.

I cannot seem to connect my thoughts,

My feet are cold, my hands are scared.

You look at me. They turn away.

It is too much for you to say, “good night, sweet dreams” . You humbled by.

But it’s not enough to stop my cries.

I scream.

I shout.

Will anyone listening.

Good night, Sweet dreams. I wish tonight.

By Julius Fa

©2020

Too Old.


“It’s been too long”, the old will say,

The steps of life, away they play,

They fought our wars, and died our deaths,

We play our phones, and curse their tones,

We disrespect these slow old men, that seem to think, inside we’re doomed,

We push them down, and make them wait,

They look so broken, with fragile weak eyes,

The youth show nothing, no matter their age, they rush and jump, no fear or pause, they talk of things, no root or cause, they worship their iPhone, Samsung and all,

This old man watches, and laughs at their ways, they are afraid, their courage is cowardly, their minds of technology, drives them towards insanity, broken and shameful, we fought for their freedom.

By Julius Fa,

©2020

Too Much Data


We live each day surrounded by data, we give our names and dates and all. Your happy Facebook and sweet Instagram profiles, unaware the dangers they pose. We absolve the many images and information they give, the sights and sounds of every bit around our world. The sad and twisted sights of hate, the dreamy lies of love, the dark side of desperation. Depression never too far behind, loneliness pulled over your eyes. We live each day with data, maybe time to turn that data away.

By Julius Fa

© February 2020

The Hack


It’s just a code, a random thought,

To some its truth, without the logic,

Each line designed, to answer a question,

Intuition exposed, my smartness composed.

It breaks through wall, the rich still guards,
Each vessel a virus, they wrestle to confine it,
They battle behind space, each letter defines ways,
To steal and mend ways, the data becomes life.

I’ll bleed them dry, before they find me,
I’m quicker than zero, to some a hero,
The loot was shared, their walls knocked down,
The download begins, their system is owned.

I’m silent within, their carelessness now seen,
Each document reveals, all secrets unlocked,
An email was sent, your passwords now sold,
Your identity misplaced, the bidding begins.

By Julius Fa
©2017

Cry in your own time! 


I’ve had enough, of you it seems, 

You cry a lot, the sound obscene, 

Of what and how, I dare not think, 

Just shout your mouth, or feel my chin. 
I tried so hard, to keep my hands, 

Between my legs, but you won’t stop, 

You shout at me, I know not why, 

I boil inside, my temper will rise. 
It came one day, when out the box, 

You threw cruel words, about my socks, 

I had enough, I slapped you hard, 

I couldn’t stop, I’ve lost control. 
They smashed the door, I smashed your face, 

Five pulled me off, your broken frame, 

They cuffed my hands, It’s filled with blood, 

I hear a cry, this time it’s mine. 
By Julius Fa,

©2016

Just Me.


I just want to write, away from here,
I have ideas, it feels like fear,
I dream big dreams, in need of things,
I want too much, I need my sleep.

I scan around, and read much blogs,
It’s full of logs, about their jobs,
They write much crap, and call it stats,
I see no change, just vanity insane.

They write each day, of things that sway,
A short display, for them a play,
A case is born, when words are spun,
I disagree, they seems to be.

I am too old, but feel too young,
To state my mind, a waste of time,
It’s lock up tight, not cause am right,
I need more work, before I write.

By Julius Fa
© 2016